Think Like a Monk: Silence, Clarity, and Returning to Yourself for the End of the Year

November used to be a month that, in itself, invited us to slow down – to soften, turn inward, warm up and reflect. Yet today, I notice more and more how, towards the end of the year, many of us actually start speeding up. As if that year-end marks a final finish line, so we rush to complete business plans, pile up even more personal obligations, make lists of everyone we “have” to see before the year ends, who to buy gifts for, what else to achieve. That’s precisely why Jay Shetty’s book came as a kind of salvation for our Materia Book Club this November.

In the material of his experiences, monastic practices and very simple, yet deeply transformative life philosophy, there is one sentence that precisely captures the essence of the entire book: “Peace is not something you find – peace is something you build.” And it is exactly that sentence that has been echoing in my thoughts as this year draws to a close.

The Rhythm of the Year, the Tired Body and the Need for Inner Order

We often choose books intuitively, but rarely does a title so organically match the rhythm of the year as it did this November. While we are emotionally and mentally closing the yearly circle, as work responsibilities enter that final, compressed phase, and the body becomes more sensitive to fatigue and exhaustion, Think Like a Monk opened exactly what we most needed in that phase: silence, clarity and a return to inner values.

Shetty writes in a very readable, almost imperceptibly simple way, but with a clear intention – to part ways with surface-level life habits. He doesn’t romanticise monastic life, doesn’t mystify the practices, doesn’t dramatise change. On the contrary, he calls us back to basics, to small but consistent shifts, to redefining the way we enter the day, how we place our attention, choose our reactions and nurture what keeps us steady.

At the same time, the book doesn’t try to be “just another self-help manual” that promises quick change. There are no instant solutions, no “morning routines that change your life in 5 steps”, no promises of ease. Instead, Shetty gently guides us towards inner discipline. And discipline, no matter how we package it, is one of the most valuable forms of self-care.

How to BE in This World

One of the most precious qualities of this book is the way Shetty “translates” monastic philosophy into everyday, worldly life. He doesn’t write about withdrawing from the world – he writes about how to be in the world without letting the world constantly tug at your sleeve.

In his definition, thinking like a monk means:

• not reacting impulsively, but consciously,
  
  

• filtering what is noise from what is truth,
  
  

• recognising which behaviours nourish you and which drain you,
  
  

• living in line with your own values, not someone else’s expectations,
  
  

• cultivating silence not as an escape, but as a source of strength,
  
  

• letting go of the need to compare yourself,
  
  

• and learning what it means to live from the inside out, not the other way around.
  
  

We often read these ideas as trendy lifestyle advice, but in the book they are explained very simply – as a human need. It’s enough to look back at just one week of our lives to see how often we react before we’ve even had time to think.

For example, how often, when we catch a moment of “empty space”, a minute of pause, instead of breathing consciously and resting, we reach for our phone and start scrolling?

How often do we allow other people’s anxiety, haste and inner turmoil to seep into us? How many times have we realised that we can no longer tell which expectations are truly ours, and which belong to society?

Letting Go – The First and Hardest Step

The first part of the book deals with one of the most demanding, yet most necessary processes: letting go.

Shetty writes about identity, inner narratives, habits, expectations we take on from others (often unconsciously), about comparison, ambitions that aren’t really ours and fears we’ve never examined.

Monastic practice is very clear: before you build, you must clear the space.

Here, the book offers exceptionally useful insights:

• letting go isn’t loss, letting go is creation;
  
  

• silence isn’t emptiness, silence is a foundation;
  
  

• inner peace doesn’t come when life becomes easier, but when it becomes clearer.
  
  

At the end of the year, nature spontaneously lets go of what no longer serves it: leaves, colours, excess energy. We should follow the same process – releasing what is spent, what no longer has a function, whether it’s things, work or people. The question we need to ask ourselves is:

What in our daily life is excess, and what is essential?

The answers are always deeply personal, but what drains us most is often tied to habits we repeat “out of inertia”.

Peace and Stability Come from Practice

The second part of the book focuses on growth – but not the outward, measurable-by-achievements kind, rather the inner, quiet and stable one. Here Shetty very precisely draws a distinction: there is progress visible to others and progress visible only to us. Only the latter has a long-term effect.

Through themes like purpose, focus, intention and discipline, the book returns us to one and the same truth:
peace and stability are not emotions, they are practice.

In this part, the following especially resonate:

• exercises that invite focus and presence,
  
  

• insights about our relationship to time as our most valuable resource,
  
  

• the idea that boundaries are not hardness, but care,
  
  

• and Shetty’s constant return to the question of values.
  
  

Readers often describe this book as one that “puts your thoughts in order”. But it doesn’t do that instead of us – it nudges us to look where we usually don’t.

Giving as the Calmest and Most Mature Form of Personal Strength

The third part of the book is perhaps the deepest. Shetty shows something rarely emphasised in self-development books: inner peace is not the final goal – it is the starting point.

When a person calms down inside, clears their inner space, builds clarity and establishes healthy boundaries, a completely new kind of strength opens up: the kind that doesn’t draw attention to itself, but is visible in every gesture, decision and reaction. To give from that place means giving without needing anything in return, without calculation, without putting it on display.

To give from abundance, not from a deficit. To give from stability, not from exhaustion.

The most important questions we rarely answer are precisely the ones that come from within – and this book has stirred up many of them.

For this hectic period, it’s important to at least reflect on how we can filter information without feeling like we’re “missing out on something”.

If we had to single out just one message this book brought to our November and the Materia Book Club, it would be this:

Inner peace doesn’t happen when the world calms down – inner peace happens when we calm down despite the world.

Shetty very clearly shows that peace is a habit, not a reward. That focus is a decision, not an accident. That discipline is care, not harshness. That value is something we live, not something we declare.

And that is why Think Like a Monk was such an important book for this month. Not because it changed us, but because it reminded us of what we already know, yet often forget:

• silence is essential to us,
  
  

• focus saves us,
  
  

• boundaries protect us,
  
  

• and peace is built from within, every day, through small, unobtrusive gestures.
  
  

Shetty invites us not to live like monks, but to think like them. And between those two ideas lies immense difference – and immense freedom.